The pain is so bad, even the bed covers touching them make it worse. Not to mention veins breaking spontaneously. I don't know why this keeps happening.
Sunday, March 11, 2018
Swollen ankles forever
I cannot tell you how sick I am of these ankles. I feel like this disease has turned into a monster and is eating away at my joints.
The pain is so bad, even the bed covers touching them make it worse. Not to mention veins breaking spontaneously. I don't know why this keeps happening.
The pain is so bad, even the bed covers touching them make it worse. Not to mention veins breaking spontaneously. I don't know why this keeps happening.
Tuesday, April 5, 2016
Family doesn't get it
Coping with chronic pain and dealing with life is really exhausting . I usually have relatives say things like wow you really seem ok to me, or you look fine , you look good you must be ok ! After 14 years of coping with pain without any pain relief I'd have to say I've become the champion of disguise . They can't see bloody guts and immediately assume I am fine. They have no clue I have been suffering in silence . For many years .
When my mom ended up in the hospital for an entire week some of my relatives were talking about genetics and how this daughter has a sore finger and how trigger finger runs in the family and another relative says her finger is sore and sometimes it's hard to bend it . I sat there quietly , said absolutely nothing . I'm thinking to myself , are they kidding me ? Are they that forgetful or are they self self absorbed ? No they didn't forget , I drove in the car with them and used my handicap plaque so I didn't have to walk as far , and my scooter wouldn't have fit in the ICU ! Such bizarre behavior , I have no problem talking about their sore fingers and feet , or whatever hurts them but I keep quiet and I often feel hesitant and unsure about chiming in on their conversation!
I'm tired tonight , tired of pretending and acting like I'm OK. I'm tired of keeping it together , struggling to get through daily activities and being asked to do special tasks because I don't work and hearing how the other relatives work and are so tired . How can I respond to that ? I don't doubt they are tired . I feel as though some of them just don't want to acknowledge my reality . I'm expected to suffer in silence , alone . I have to keep up this nonsense that I'm ok and not talk about the pink elephant that is sitting on my lap for the past 14 years of my life . That I can't get up out of bed in the morning and I need a scooter to shop - maybe that's too embarrassing for them ? Maybe I embarrass them ?
When my mom ended up in the hospital for an entire week some of my relatives were talking about genetics and how this daughter has a sore finger and how trigger finger runs in the family and another relative says her finger is sore and sometimes it's hard to bend it . I sat there quietly , said absolutely nothing . I'm thinking to myself , are they kidding me ? Are they that forgetful or are they self self absorbed ? No they didn't forget , I drove in the car with them and used my handicap plaque so I didn't have to walk as far , and my scooter wouldn't have fit in the ICU ! Such bizarre behavior , I have no problem talking about their sore fingers and feet , or whatever hurts them but I keep quiet and I often feel hesitant and unsure about chiming in on their conversation!
I'm tired tonight , tired of pretending and acting like I'm OK. I'm tired of keeping it together , struggling to get through daily activities and being asked to do special tasks because I don't work and hearing how the other relatives work and are so tired . How can I respond to that ? I don't doubt they are tired . I feel as though some of them just don't want to acknowledge my reality . I'm expected to suffer in silence , alone . I have to keep up this nonsense that I'm ok and not talk about the pink elephant that is sitting on my lap for the past 14 years of my life . That I can't get up out of bed in the morning and I need a scooter to shop - maybe that's too embarrassing for them ? Maybe I embarrass them ?
Wednesday, March 23, 2016
Suffering alone...
I find myself suffering a lot, in silence. My amazing husband deserves to be recognized, awarded for being not only a hard worker, an amazing dad, but also an amazing husband and caretaker of me, his wife. He has always adored me regardless of what I look like, and has been behind me 100% of the time. This man will bend down and pick me up off of the floor when I cannot get up. He will wash my hair for me, help me get dressed, and drive me many miles just to drop me off at my moms house when I cannot drive. I dont stay silent because I'm worried about him being upset, I often feel like a burden. And I, too, get sick and tired of sounding like a broken record. Seriously, how many times can he ask, whats wrong, and I answer, my ankles and feet feel like they are being stabbed to death. It gets old, hearing about the same thing over and over again, year after year.
How do others cope with this much suffering and still enjoy their life? How do you continue with a normal life when you have uncontrolled pain? And when I go to lunch or dinner, the last thing I want to talk about and focus on are my feet. But at the same time, when you are the one suffering, it seems to be almost impossible not to talk about it, or even worse, pretend its not happening, and suffer in silence. You dont really know if another person is suffering, because I am here to tell you its perfectly possible to fool everyone. I may seem aloof, detached, my mind someplace far, far away, I may not answer a question correctly being overwhelmed with chronic pain, but I want to be a better person, and I want to make others aware that you never really know is someone is suffering with some disease, trying to be like a chameleon, and trying to fool even themselves.
How do others cope with this much suffering and still enjoy their life? How do you continue with a normal life when you have uncontrolled pain? And when I go to lunch or dinner, the last thing I want to talk about and focus on are my feet. But at the same time, when you are the one suffering, it seems to be almost impossible not to talk about it, or even worse, pretend its not happening, and suffer in silence. You dont really know if another person is suffering, because I am here to tell you its perfectly possible to fool everyone. I may seem aloof, detached, my mind someplace far, far away, I may not answer a question correctly being overwhelmed with chronic pain, but I want to be a better person, and I want to make others aware that you never really know is someone is suffering with some disease, trying to be like a chameleon, and trying to fool even themselves.
In a fog....
I get up in the morning, barely able to roll out of bed. I slowly allow my feet to hit the ground and reach for the dresser or the bed frame to hold me up. Sometimes my hands are so bad they wont open, or close to grab things, so I end up with bruises. There have been days where Ive had to roll out of bed, onto the floor and have to crawl to the bathroom. My ankles swell and no longer look like ankles, so bad I have stretch marks on them. Ironically, I have a walker, that I sometimes have next to my bed, but I fight within myself about using it.
I wonder how I will manage to actually walk the dogs, they have to be walked, I think to myself the second I wake up. We live in an apartment, no place for them to go potty. Each step I take, I wonder how I will continue walking, and I will get maybe one block away, and wonder how I will make it back home.
I put pressure on myself, to try and walk. If I cannot walk I feel like I have lost this 14 year battle. Most of the time I feel like I am walking in a fog, my memory from having chronic pain is getting bad. Ive never had pain relief, and I fear it is taking its toll of my entire being. I feel different than everyone else, half the time I speak I am trying to keep myself focused on the subject instead of thinking about how I am going to continue to walk, or cook, or simple things like continue to have a conversation.
It amazes me what I think about during one day, that most people may not think about, ever. I see people out walking, jogging, read about my friends taking Yoga, or lifting weights, hitting the gym, taking some 60 day test to lose 20 pounds. I find myself thinking, how lucky they are and how they dont have a clue how quickly this freedom can be snatched away from a person, the freedom to walk, to get out of bed, to wash your hair, to get dressed. In general people say I look great, but when I look in the mirror I see this woman, who is consciously trying to stay conscious. To blend in with the others, but in doing so, the enjoyment of life is often gone. I am so focused on feeling good and looking the same as everyone else, I lose track of what is being said, I cant focus on topics, and I find myself drifting away trying to continue to smile, to speak and appear to have it altogether. I get lost in conversation, all the time. I say things I really dont mean, because I feel like I am just trying to stay afloat. What I want to say is in my head, I just cant seem to get it out.
I realized I sigh a lot, my oldest son had thought I was annoyed with something we were doing together, and I had to think about what he said, while my husband answered saying, she is in pain. I hate this part of myself, the part that cant seem to keep up with an entire day. I am sighing because of the pain, trying to continue to function and really wanting to be part of the commotion, the cooking, the talking and enjoyment.
Chronic, uncontrolled pain, meaning I do not take any drugs for pain, really has taken a lot from me, and I feel angry about that.
I wonder how I will manage to actually walk the dogs, they have to be walked, I think to myself the second I wake up. We live in an apartment, no place for them to go potty. Each step I take, I wonder how I will continue walking, and I will get maybe one block away, and wonder how I will make it back home.
I put pressure on myself, to try and walk. If I cannot walk I feel like I have lost this 14 year battle. Most of the time I feel like I am walking in a fog, my memory from having chronic pain is getting bad. Ive never had pain relief, and I fear it is taking its toll of my entire being. I feel different than everyone else, half the time I speak I am trying to keep myself focused on the subject instead of thinking about how I am going to continue to walk, or cook, or simple things like continue to have a conversation.
It amazes me what I think about during one day, that most people may not think about, ever. I see people out walking, jogging, read about my friends taking Yoga, or lifting weights, hitting the gym, taking some 60 day test to lose 20 pounds. I find myself thinking, how lucky they are and how they dont have a clue how quickly this freedom can be snatched away from a person, the freedom to walk, to get out of bed, to wash your hair, to get dressed. In general people say I look great, but when I look in the mirror I see this woman, who is consciously trying to stay conscious. To blend in with the others, but in doing so, the enjoyment of life is often gone. I am so focused on feeling good and looking the same as everyone else, I lose track of what is being said, I cant focus on topics, and I find myself drifting away trying to continue to smile, to speak and appear to have it altogether. I get lost in conversation, all the time. I say things I really dont mean, because I feel like I am just trying to stay afloat. What I want to say is in my head, I just cant seem to get it out.
I realized I sigh a lot, my oldest son had thought I was annoyed with something we were doing together, and I had to think about what he said, while my husband answered saying, she is in pain. I hate this part of myself, the part that cant seem to keep up with an entire day. I am sighing because of the pain, trying to continue to function and really wanting to be part of the commotion, the cooking, the talking and enjoyment.
Chronic, uncontrolled pain, meaning I do not take any drugs for pain, really has taken a lot from me, and I feel angry about that.
Tuesday, March 22, 2016
Knowing humility
I finally had to get a scooter, a cute little 3 wheeled Go-go scooter! I park it in the living room, afraid someone will steal it out of my car and its taken so long to finally break down and buy it, I figure if someone steals it I may never get up enough nerve to buy another one.
I cant deny it was amazing, scooting around the mall over the Holiday, being able to shop for hours, looking at everything, and not being tired. My hands hurt using the scooter but because my feet are at rest I am not suffering with foot and ankle pain.
I get a lot of looks. Kids stare, people look at me, trying to figure out whats wrong with me. I am obviously not on this scooter because I'm too heavy to walk. Most people are helpful when I'm riding it, some are too helpful which annoys me, and I think to myself that most of these people would not even notice me if I were not on this scooter.
Parking in the handicapped spot without my scooter, old ladies have yelled at me, asking me whats wrong with me, but when I have my scooter, nothing is said, no strange looks questioning my ability.
Humility is getting on this scooter, at my age, and going shopping. Accepting what I cannot change, and trying to enjoy myself regardless of the status of my body not working. Vanity is on the side lines, testing me each and every day. Remembering what the nuns taught us in Catholic School, that whats on the inside is more important. Somehow, I struggle with this, its a battle of my self image, something I have already been struggling with my entire life, and now to add to the mix a little red scooter that makes me stand out, makes me look weak in my mind, I am no longer standing on my own two feet.
I hate losing control, I hate not being able to walk. But somehow I need to find the strength to move forward and accept what I cannot change.
I cant deny it was amazing, scooting around the mall over the Holiday, being able to shop for hours, looking at everything, and not being tired. My hands hurt using the scooter but because my feet are at rest I am not suffering with foot and ankle pain.
I get a lot of looks. Kids stare, people look at me, trying to figure out whats wrong with me. I am obviously not on this scooter because I'm too heavy to walk. Most people are helpful when I'm riding it, some are too helpful which annoys me, and I think to myself that most of these people would not even notice me if I were not on this scooter.
Parking in the handicapped spot without my scooter, old ladies have yelled at me, asking me whats wrong with me, but when I have my scooter, nothing is said, no strange looks questioning my ability.
Humility is getting on this scooter, at my age, and going shopping. Accepting what I cannot change, and trying to enjoy myself regardless of the status of my body not working. Vanity is on the side lines, testing me each and every day. Remembering what the nuns taught us in Catholic School, that whats on the inside is more important. Somehow, I struggle with this, its a battle of my self image, something I have already been struggling with my entire life, and now to add to the mix a little red scooter that makes me stand out, makes me look weak in my mind, I am no longer standing on my own two feet.
I hate losing control, I hate not being able to walk. But somehow I need to find the strength to move forward and accept what I cannot change.
Wednesday, February 4, 2015
Loss of control
Everyone has an opinion or a suggestion as to what I should try to cure this disease. Or they have an idea, about what they think I should be doing instead of what I have been doing. Its bad enough that I have to cope with the fact that I have lost control of my own body, somewhat. Its even more frustrating staying civil and kind to strangers that offer their unsolicited advice.
Seriously, I doubt eating "wheat grass" is going to miraculously cure me. I don't doubt it may help some, but it is not the cure.
How do the others with this awful disease cope with the loss of control? Not being able to walk, go places, alone or without assistance? Taking breaks in my car when shopping, I can't make it to more than one store without a break in between. Its how I cope with the pain. Sometimes I can make it to only one store in one day. I refuse to lay down and accept that I cannot move, I push myself beyond the point I think most push themselves, those who do and do not have any sort of disease that limits their abilities.
My sleep is affected by insane pain, and during the day it strikes me down, but I continue. I have zero pain relief, except taking prednisone. At this point I have to back off, I have gained so much weight that its no longer beneficial for me. Stopping the prednisone I have lost almost 9 pounds in a very short time. I feel that I need some control, at least with my weight.
Every day is a battle, to fight the inevitable, the pain that strikes me and challenges my spirit and ability to continue to enjoy my life.
I REFUSE to allow this disease to take me down.
Seriously, I doubt eating "wheat grass" is going to miraculously cure me. I don't doubt it may help some, but it is not the cure.
How do the others with this awful disease cope with the loss of control? Not being able to walk, go places, alone or without assistance? Taking breaks in my car when shopping, I can't make it to more than one store without a break in between. Its how I cope with the pain. Sometimes I can make it to only one store in one day. I refuse to lay down and accept that I cannot move, I push myself beyond the point I think most push themselves, those who do and do not have any sort of disease that limits their abilities.
My sleep is affected by insane pain, and during the day it strikes me down, but I continue. I have zero pain relief, except taking prednisone. At this point I have to back off, I have gained so much weight that its no longer beneficial for me. Stopping the prednisone I have lost almost 9 pounds in a very short time. I feel that I need some control, at least with my weight.
Every day is a battle, to fight the inevitable, the pain that strikes me and challenges my spirit and ability to continue to enjoy my life.
I REFUSE to allow this disease to take me down.
Sunday, January 25, 2015
Can't believe so many years have gone by
It was Christmas morning 2002 that I woke up and knew something was wrong. That was 12 years ago. Its been a battle ever since. RA has taken up so much of my time, energy and thoughts.
I took a break from meds for a while. Just to give my body a rest. I also went back to see my original rheumatologist a few months ago.
I also found a new general doctor, who is paying attention. I've had chronically low vitamin D for many, many years. I take large doses of vitamin D, and there is no change, this has been going on for about 9 years. SO my original rheumatologist mentions seeing an endocrinologist. I saw my general doctor again, and I tell him my rheum would like me to go see an endocrinologist. He looks at my chart and brings up the fact that I have medullary sponge kidneys, and says that could be the reason why I have such low vitamin D. WOW, nobody has thought of that, or mentioned it. So I see this new doctor tomorrow. We shall she what he says, and I've been warned he's a bit odd. Hooray, I'm so excited, another doctor! hahaha!
I don't quite feel like I'm living a nightmare, but there is some serious bargaining and juggling of thoughts going on in my head all the time. I try not to go too far ahead in time, and think about what my life is going to be like then. There is no quick fix, no magic pill as of yet. I have hope they will find a cure, but until then life goes on. I have to be able to wake up and function, even if that means I need an electric scooter to get around.
Its amazing how before this disease, I never thought twice about my body and its simple functions like walking. We take so much for granted, and we never really think about getting sick and losing the ability to walk.
I took a break from meds for a while. Just to give my body a rest. I also went back to see my original rheumatologist a few months ago.
I also found a new general doctor, who is paying attention. I've had chronically low vitamin D for many, many years. I take large doses of vitamin D, and there is no change, this has been going on for about 9 years. SO my original rheumatologist mentions seeing an endocrinologist. I saw my general doctor again, and I tell him my rheum would like me to go see an endocrinologist. He looks at my chart and brings up the fact that I have medullary sponge kidneys, and says that could be the reason why I have such low vitamin D. WOW, nobody has thought of that, or mentioned it. So I see this new doctor tomorrow. We shall she what he says, and I've been warned he's a bit odd. Hooray, I'm so excited, another doctor! hahaha!
I don't quite feel like I'm living a nightmare, but there is some serious bargaining and juggling of thoughts going on in my head all the time. I try not to go too far ahead in time, and think about what my life is going to be like then. There is no quick fix, no magic pill as of yet. I have hope they will find a cure, but until then life goes on. I have to be able to wake up and function, even if that means I need an electric scooter to get around.
Its amazing how before this disease, I never thought twice about my body and its simple functions like walking. We take so much for granted, and we never really think about getting sick and losing the ability to walk.
Being forced to slow down
I cannot deny that I am greatly annoyed with having to slow down this much. Nothing wrong with my mind, and I luckily do not suffer from any type of depression. Having said that, I also cannot deny that I am feeling kind of sorry for myself. It will pass and I will adjust to this new normal.
I adjusted back in 2003 when I went from being super mom, to not being able to move. It was actually Christmas 2002 when it hit me, feels like it happened overnight. I had to adjust then, and it was really hard. I can still recall how I felt inside, and certain movies and television shows I was watching, suffering in silence. My kids were still young, and I didn't want to scare them. It was like I was taken by storm, my entire life was swept up and taken out to sea, never to return. I guess this recent setback with my feet and ankles will take me time to adjust to, but I don't like not being able to get out of the house on my own, and I need to purchase a little electric cart to get around.
Having to sit and/or lay down with my feet up is like torture. I think of the things I want to be doing, and I can feel my blood pressure raising. Sometimes I imagine myself hiking to the top of a mountain at sunset, and imagine the sun shining and feeling the warmth.
I can't always control the way I feel about this, and is why I at times feel sorry for myself. I get annoyed, irritable, and short tempered.
My husband is the RA champ, he really is wonderful. He is always very positive and matter of fact about the reality. Today, I couldn't get up, and just felt awful in general. I called him at work to see if he'd pick up some items at the store before he comes home. I later texted him and said I was taking a hot bath and maybe I'd be able get to the store. It took me hours, but I did manage to make it to the store.
Each day I find some reason to get up, and move about. Since this nonsense with my feet and ankles, I find myself spending more time in the house than ever. Bathing, washing my hair, getting dressed, and putting on make up is a struggle. Trying to keep my life somewhat normal is a challenge.
I adjusted back in 2003 when I went from being super mom, to not being able to move. It was actually Christmas 2002 when it hit me, feels like it happened overnight. I had to adjust then, and it was really hard. I can still recall how I felt inside, and certain movies and television shows I was watching, suffering in silence. My kids were still young, and I didn't want to scare them. It was like I was taken by storm, my entire life was swept up and taken out to sea, never to return. I guess this recent setback with my feet and ankles will take me time to adjust to, but I don't like not being able to get out of the house on my own, and I need to purchase a little electric cart to get around.
Having to sit and/or lay down with my feet up is like torture. I think of the things I want to be doing, and I can feel my blood pressure raising. Sometimes I imagine myself hiking to the top of a mountain at sunset, and imagine the sun shining and feeling the warmth.
I can't always control the way I feel about this, and is why I at times feel sorry for myself. I get annoyed, irritable, and short tempered.
My husband is the RA champ, he really is wonderful. He is always very positive and matter of fact about the reality. Today, I couldn't get up, and just felt awful in general. I called him at work to see if he'd pick up some items at the store before he comes home. I later texted him and said I was taking a hot bath and maybe I'd be able get to the store. It took me hours, but I did manage to make it to the store.
Each day I find some reason to get up, and move about. Since this nonsense with my feet and ankles, I find myself spending more time in the house than ever. Bathing, washing my hair, getting dressed, and putting on make up is a struggle. Trying to keep my life somewhat normal is a challenge.
Stretch marks on feet & ankles from swelling
I decided to make this a separate blog. So how many of you have stretch marks on the tops of your ankles and sides from swelling so badly? I also have new stretch marks on the front of my ankle area, just about where a short sock would sit. Its so bizarre, I don't have any fat there!
The pain is so awful, its like I'm being tortured, even when I am not standing. The pain in my feet and ankles at night is like severe stabbing, can also feel like burning, and just flat out misery.
Do any of you have this issue? Its new for me, and funny that I'm turning 50 this year, is this a sign of whats to come? hahaha!
The pain is so awful, its like I'm being tortured, even when I am not standing. The pain in my feet and ankles at night is like severe stabbing, can also feel like burning, and just flat out misery.
Do any of you have this issue? Its new for me, and funny that I'm turning 50 this year, is this a sign of whats to come? hahaha!
Feet and ankle battle
So around June of 2014 my feet started acting up. My ankles are constantly swelling, so that part was nothing new. But my feet, the pain in my heels and up the back of my heel was so excruciatingly painful, I was finding it difficult to even walk.
Months passed, and next thing I know, I am unable to get out of bed, literally. I'm stumbling around trying to get up even out of a chair. Going shopping, yeah right. Over the Holiday, I had to drive to each store, even those in the mall, and hobble into the store, sitting just to get to the department I needed to get to. More than one store required at least a 20 minute break in my car.
So I dug out my walker, which helps me get out of bed, sometimes. If it so bad, I cannot use my feet at all. I've had to drop to my knees and crawl to the bathroom, which is the only place I really need to go when I'm home alone. After I get up, I usually get warmed up a little bit, and I'm not falling down.
So to my old rheumatologist I went, I have been without one for months. Tests, blood work, and finally a decision to go back on methotrexate again. This time I'm trying the self injectable shots, 15mg per week of the nasty stuff. I'm trying to have a good attitude about it, but Im really struggling.
Does anyone else have giant ankles, tops of the feet swelling, such severe pain on the bottoms of my heels and up my achilles tendon that I'd like to vomit.
Months passed, and next thing I know, I am unable to get out of bed, literally. I'm stumbling around trying to get up even out of a chair. Going shopping, yeah right. Over the Holiday, I had to drive to each store, even those in the mall, and hobble into the store, sitting just to get to the department I needed to get to. More than one store required at least a 20 minute break in my car.
So I dug out my walker, which helps me get out of bed, sometimes. If it so bad, I cannot use my feet at all. I've had to drop to my knees and crawl to the bathroom, which is the only place I really need to go when I'm home alone. After I get up, I usually get warmed up a little bit, and I'm not falling down.
So to my old rheumatologist I went, I have been without one for months. Tests, blood work, and finally a decision to go back on methotrexate again. This time I'm trying the self injectable shots, 15mg per week of the nasty stuff. I'm trying to have a good attitude about it, but Im really struggling.
Does anyone else have giant ankles, tops of the feet swelling, such severe pain on the bottoms of my heels and up my achilles tendon that I'd like to vomit.
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Rheumatoid arthritis up for grabs, any takers?
Christmas Eve 2002 it hit. I woke up to take the dog out, the sun was just coming up. I had been up very late the night before prepping for Christmas morning and I was exhausted. A little problem, I can't move to get out of bed! I tap my husband to wake him up, I need help honey. He literally "rolled" me out of bed. My feet hit the floor and I cringed with pain. My mind racing, trying to figure out why they felt like I had run a marathon barefoot! Both feet felt broken, or at least that's how it felt to me! I chalked it up to wearing those beloved flip flops of mine!
There you have it, but little did I know my life would never be the same again. My oldest son was 13, my daughter was 11 and the baby was 8 when rheumatoid arthritis reared its ugly head. I was 36 years old, and I honestly have never been the same since. I was no longer super mom.
Months of visiting different doctors left me frustrated and without any explanation. They checked me for a lot of different diseases, a few tests came back odd, but no smoking gun. I saw a rheumatologist who basically told me I was having this terrible pain because of my childhood!!!! Well, maybe I am a bit nutty but this brutal pain that had spread to both of my arms and hands/wrists was real, and I knew I wasn't that nutty!
Anyhow, I was diagnosed finally, after having an MRI of both hands/wrists.
That was 10 years ago.
I've been through treatment after treatment. The only one that worked ended up giving me a stroke like drug reaction. You name it, I've tried it. Almost died from one infusion of Remicade.
I'm currently on no meds for RA, awaiting my new doctor since changing my insurance January 2013. Now I have to start all over with new doctors. Should be interesting.
There you have it, but little did I know my life would never be the same again. My oldest son was 13, my daughter was 11 and the baby was 8 when rheumatoid arthritis reared its ugly head. I was 36 years old, and I honestly have never been the same since. I was no longer super mom.
Months of visiting different doctors left me frustrated and without any explanation. They checked me for a lot of different diseases, a few tests came back odd, but no smoking gun. I saw a rheumatologist who basically told me I was having this terrible pain because of my childhood!!!! Well, maybe I am a bit nutty but this brutal pain that had spread to both of my arms and hands/wrists was real, and I knew I wasn't that nutty!
Anyhow, I was diagnosed finally, after having an MRI of both hands/wrists.
That was 10 years ago.
I've been through treatment after treatment. The only one that worked ended up giving me a stroke like drug reaction. You name it, I've tried it. Almost died from one infusion of Remicade.
I'm currently on no meds for RA, awaiting my new doctor since changing my insurance January 2013. Now I have to start all over with new doctors. Should be interesting.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)